Audition Concert

First of all, thank you so much to all the friends and family who came over this morning to listen to me sing and give me some constructive criticism. One of the hardest parts of this process so far is choosing the right song. I had seven songs on my list of possibilities this morning and I've narrowed the list down to three as a result of your comments. The original list included: A Change is Gonna Come and I'll Take Care of You (as you saw), Dimming of the Day (Bonnie Raitt), Samson (Regina Spektor), Summertime (from Porgy and Bess), Unchained Melody (Righteous Brothers), and Crazy (Patsy Cline). I've decided to focus only on A Change is Gonna Come, Crazy, and Samson for auditions. This means I can put my efforts this week into polishing them up! That's a big help.

It was also good for me to face some of my nervousness and sing for a crowd, albeit a friendly crowd. Singing (especially a cappella) can feel very vulnerable and I definitely feel like there's no place to hide when I am being heard. A wrong note is very obvious; a weak phrase sticks out. It is a challenge for me to open myself up in such an exposed way. I am learning to trust my body and expect the notes to be there, and it gives me the confidence to push through this anxiety. When I think positively and trust myself, a calm softens my whole body and the notes are so much easier. I have to remember that on audition day.

This concert/party came at the right moment for me. Last week, Ethan and I made the important decisions for our travel plans and child care, so those concerns were laid to rest. But I was still feeling overwhelmed with song-choice. With a narrower list, I can spend the next week "working them into my voice", which is how I describe the process of singing a song so repeatedly that it becomes a part of my bones. When I have the lyrics and phrasing "worked in", I can start thinking about the emotions and meaning of the song, its message, the most important part! I am looking forward to getting these songs to that point, where the songs are a part of me. With that done, I can sing from inside each note rather than anticipate the next chorus or lyric. This is the focus of my next week, a tedious path toward the important.

I had a great time this morning sharing a few songs, some mimosas, coffee and Ethan's amazing Danish and scones. The hugs and well-wishes felt great, too. I feel very loved and supported, and I am so grateful that I have the incredibly loving family and friends that I do. I am having a blast following my dream! Thank you for encouraging me to do so!